Have you ever read a book and thought "that's not how people talk"? I get this a lot with some children and young adult books. When editing, make sure to pay close attention to the dialogue. Read the dialogue aloud. Hearing how the character speaks will help. When reviewing the dialogue, keep a few things in mind:
-does the words, grammar, sentence structure fit in with the character's personality. (Ex. a British character will say "Mum" instead of "Mom" and a small child may not have perfect grammar or big words)
-does your character have any distinguishing features with how he/she speaks? If the character stammers (occasionally) consider "P-p-p-p-please," over "Please"
-Does the dialogue give too much away. Don't have a villain who explains everything including his/her motivation. You can allude to backstory, but be mindful of saying everything.
When you are done reviewing it, ask a trusted friend about any sections you still aren't sure about. In the editing process, as many set of eyes as possible is always helpful.
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